The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
