I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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