So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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