I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
