Your tits are I can't wait for
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
