Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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