i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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