Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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