First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
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We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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