I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
