I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize