i may or may not be watching the land before time
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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