Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
