So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
