my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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