do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
