If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize