Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
my shit smells like andre
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
