You're a womanizer and a bitch.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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