Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
