Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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