I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
