You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I woke up under a house in Key West
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