took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Life is so much better after having sex.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
