Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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