i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
