Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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