At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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