Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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