Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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