I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
