Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
