everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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