just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
