He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
