you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I need a beard to bite.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
