am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
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