I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
