You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
