It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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