his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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