I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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