Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
