all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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