I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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