Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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