He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
