The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
