just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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