I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize