Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just crazy horny about you
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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